Many Drummers Suffering The Same Hallucination

It has come to the attention of The Hip Rhythm Digest that
many drummers, world wide, are simultaneously having
the same hallucination and are suddenly thinking that the
drum stick in their hand has become a ball,
and when they are informed of the reality that
they are holding a hammer not a ball,
their hallucinations increase and they begin to insist that
they are free of the effects of gravity and anatomy
because the stick is a ball.

Originally it was thought that this hallucination was spread
by personal contact with infected drummers Chapin and
Gruber, but the hallucination has been transfered
to a DVD that drummers merely have to watch prior to
exhibiting this strange behavior.

The Hip Rhythm's staff are trying to
get to the bottom of these alarming reports,
Hopefully these hallucinations can be stopped
before too many drummers permanently lose touch
with reality.